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This week’s naughty narrative is The Mad House by Liza James, a dark sapphic romance about stepsisters Grab a blanket and maybe your therapist’s number, freaky little strumpets, because this week we’re checking into The Mad House by Liza James. It’s a D-A-R-K (as coined by your Minister of Moisture) sapphic romance about stepsisters Ophelia and Cedar, raised in a religious cult. Cedar escapes. Ophelia doesn’t, until her protector alter ego takes over. Add a tattoo artist by day, vigilante by night who does not do tender. We work out the book’s boob-to-bloodshed ratio and assign ourselves dominant alter egos (say hi to Carissa, Cindy, and a secretary who enforces bedtime). We also play Fuck, Marry, Yeet: Step & Cousin Edition and coin “fincest” for the official glossary. Plus: why Elisa will never, ever let Colleen get her dessert “foamy.” It’s a heavy book, and it earns at least one drip.
⚠️ Content warning: The Mad House deals with rape, sexual assault, violence, homophobia, animal cruelty, self-harm, and religious trauma. This is not a cozy monster romance. If that’s too much right now, skip this one. We’ll be back next week with sexy jack-o’-lanterns and licorice Shibari.
We also cover:
-The juicy vs. moist summit, and Colleen’s cream-filled dessert incident
-Whether the vigilantism was too much or not nearly enough
-The boob-to-bloodshed ratio, and why we needed more nipple play just for hope
-Elisa’s deep dive into “Zion,” which turned out to be a biblical place and not a planet
-A real-life cult rabbit hole, plus Jess’s take as a former trauma therapist in corrections
-Our dominant alter egos, revealed
-Fuck, Marry, Yeet: Step & Cousin Edition
-New glossary entries: fincest, faux-cest, incest light, and vigilantism (not vigilante)
-Who this book is actually for: anyone processing religious trauma
Moisture Meter: 💧 / Spice: 🌶️½
Spoilers always. Judgment sometimes. Tenderness never.
If you need support:
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988
RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673, or text HOPE to 64673